August

Rest is not Less

No Comments

Remember when you were a child and you had to rest and you thought life was so hard. Children never want to rest even when it’s best for them. Oh, they complain something fierce when they have to rest and recover from an illness. Seasons of rest have purpose too. Rest is hard isn’t it? I have been in a season of rest, not because I have been ill but to avoid burnout. At first, I was happy about this season but quickly I began to whine and feel restless. I didn’t feel productive enough, I failed to see the productivity in the rest because I failed to see my purpose. What is my purpose if I am not doing for God? I am a doer for God, doing makes me feel productive and when I am productive I feel I have purpose. So not doing makes me feel unproductive which leaves me feeling like I have no purpose. Sigh, the webs we weave. I have learned the difference between restlessness and stirred. Restlessness leaves you feeling incomplete, empty of sorts, anxious, and confused. To be stirred brings motivation, encouragement to complete the task and season at hand, and assurance God is with you. God does not bring us the feeling of restlessness because He doesn’t move in chaos. Instead God calls us out of chaos and into order that inspires and assures us. God is the great encourager!

I am learning it is okay to be still for a season. This does not diminish purpose even though it feels like it. We come from an over active society, everybody is running there, everybody is doing this, life is a whirl of hectic blurred vision of comings and goings. The message society gives us is that if we are not in constant motion we are not being productive therefore we can’t possibly have purpose.

God’s methods are not parallel to the world’s methods, He works things out for the good of His people, which usually requires at some point stillness; thus, Psalms 46 says “be still and know that I am God.” Stillness is sitting motionless before the Lord in the quiet of His presence while He renews your heart and soothes all the unseen wounds you have absorbed. Stillness is learning the Lord’s voice as we wait for new instructions. Stillness is not for the faint of heart but if we allow it what stillness brings is tranquility. A sea of serenity, calming, gentle, and comforting to weary hearts.

Here is what I am in the process of learning in this season (and it is such a difficult season read previous blog) it is okay to be still for a season. This does not diminish purpose. It will however slow productivity down for a time but this is for a greater out-pouring. I have had to tell myself stop whining during your rest and begin to ask God for vision and preparation for a better outflow of works when He calls upon you. It’s important we learn to be prepared to be ready.

I have had to learn new tactics the enemy is throwing at me and it has not been easy. I have had some failures and some victories. The devil loves to attempt to drown us in turmoil: chaos, confusion, and discontentment. I think dissatisfaction is one the most used weapons of the devil. One of my battles is discontentment. I think this is a distraction that the devil uses so I stop focusing on God.  Victories are won through battle, trusting God can be a battle if we are discontent with the season He has placed us in.

I don’t know your season or your battle but I hope you learn to cultivate your faith in God and know He will see you through. That God has purpose for what you are facing even if you can’t see it now, He sees it.

Proverbs 3: Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Good Afternoon Ladies…

 

 

Continue Reading

August

Uptown Funk Not

No Comments

If my life were a movie scene right now it would be Molly Ringwald and Michael Anthony Hall in Sixteen Candles… “Its physically impossible for me to get happy.” I have been quoting that line for the last few weeks. Yes, we are big quoters in this family… (I am aware quoters is not a real word.) O-o

I don’t know how you have been feeling but lately I have been in a pretty ugly funk. It’s the kind of funk brought on by several factors: hormones (rage, cry, etc…), a mid-life crisis of sorts, and not having a church home at the moment. The hormones are a wreck in themselves and I eat pretty keto and when I don’t I am eating low carb -high fat that means no sugar, no processed foods, no wheat/gluten. I say this because diet can cause all kinds of issues but mine is pretty clean. Mid-life crisis, the usual I am restless (which I know is not from God), I would love to move back to my home town but I am tethered to my current city so my kids can finish school or the majority of them (one is in college, one in high-school, one in middle school). My home town has changed so much that we almost feel like nomads, gypsies without a home base when go visit. I feel isolated and alone, do you ever feel that way? Everyone is busy with their lives, life is hectic and rushed. I am one of those people that is like send me an invite but you know I am not going to attend. I just need to know you still care through the invitation- ha! I look at people with pep in their step and I am like if only, how do they stay so peppy? How do they remain in joy? I feel like I am over here drowning. Drowning in life changes that are occurring to me (via hormones), drowning in a probable mid-life crisis, drowning in not knowing exactly what God is saying to me, what direction He is sending me in. AHHHHH…. It’s enough to make me want to eat a big fat sundae or down a bottle of wine… but really it means I need to head into prayer. FUNK… and it’s not the Uptown Funk that features Bruno Mars… I wish! You know that feeling of “blah” you don’t really want to participate, you don’t really want to stay home, you don’t really want to do anything but you want to do something, have some kind of variation in life. What’s a girl to do when she needs a transformation in her life?  Here is what I’d like to say: there are going to be times your family and friends are too busy for you not because they don’t love you but because life in today’s world is a whirl of blur on most given days. There will be times in your life you feel let down, alone, and even confused; in those moments you have to keep moving forward. Forward as in advancing onward, propelled ahead from the last the step you made. Those steps are so hard to make in silence, alone, and sometimes running on empty (Jackson Brown). The last month has been a very difficult one for me: anxiety has been high, depression was lurking around, and the rage (ah the rage that bubbles up at times)… also the uncertainty about what God was/is doing in my life… pair this was restlessness and a mid-life crisis and you have the perfect recipe for a forty something meltdown.

I like the way The Message bible (commentary) has Romans 8: 25 All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it’s not only around us; it’s within us. The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We’re also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance… 26-28 Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves….

The Apostle Paul goes on to say in Romans 8: 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Despite what I am going through or how alone I feel, or whatever may be happening within me I know that I am really never alone, I know that I can always go to Jesus no matter the day or time. I love that the Apostle Paul encourages us to remember we were created to be champions. A conqueror overcomes, defeats, and masters. Sometimes the hardest battle to overcome is within… You are not alone, we are all battling something.

Psalms 77:14 You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the people. I marvel at that verse. God displays His power among the people… that is incredible when you really look at people. What love, what compassion, what forgiveness, and what encouragement God has for us! God is personal in nature, desiring to be part of our messy, loud, unkempt lives… to display His love through incredible displays of affection. Even when I don’t know, I trust that God does know and has a plan… especially in my hormonal, stormy, out of control temper, mid-life crisis life.

Good Afternoon Ladies!

 

Continue Reading

July

Echoes

No Comments

Sometimes when my house is quiet my mind thinks it still hears my little dog Ajax mottling around but he has been gone (he died) for several months now. He lived in this house for 14 years and although I know I really do not hear him, it’s like an echo in my mine that keeps playing familiar sounds. Not all familiar sounds are beneficial though, as we were driving home from the beach this week, my mind began to hear the echo of my past, it was not a friendly echo, but one of shame. One I wanted to run from, one I wished had never occurred, one that made me think, how can God love me?

An echo is something that repeats over and over again. I think sometimes we let the echo of our past shatter our progress at moving ahead. We stand looking down the cavern of our past, unable to move away from the echo ricocheting off the walls of our mind and heart. I do not think there is healing in the echo that continues to reverberate in our hearts as it drudges up things of forgotten, the things of the past. The Lord is eager to forgive and mend, bringing calm to our shattered hearts while soothing our minds, quieting the echo that haunts us, that tells we are not good enough, that shames us, that reminds us of past wrongs.

We all have echoes of some sort, no matter our socioeconomic bracket, church background, or education level. We all have echoes that from time to time resound like a boom in our heart attempting to bind us to a past that we have already been forgiven for as it whispers you are not lovable, you are not worthy, see here is the proof. The boom of defeat from the echoes of our past is crushing as it attempts to smolder out any rays of hope. God will not be defeated by the echoes that taunt us, He brings victory.

In Titus 3: 3 At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. 4 But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, 5 he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, 6 whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.

How grateful I am that I am not bound, imprisoned to my past. I am not confined to relive all my past mistakes. In fact, I am not a captive at all, I have been set free to observe the beauty of the Lord all around me and moving within me. Although the devil would have me constricted by the echoes of my past, they cannot detain me any longer. Therefore, I take delight in John 8: 36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. I don’t know what you are going through, or how colorful your past has been but I want to assure you that you are not alone. We all walk the same path to Jesus Christ, while our sins are individual in nature, the route to forgiveness and renewal is the same for all. His love is enough because it is encompassing: covering our past, present, and future. John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. God’s love for us will not be re-routed by our sin, nor will it be stopped by echoes of our past. Why? Because God makes the sweetest melodies from our chaotic, messy, disarrayed lives… melodies of worship, should we allow Him. If you have not invited God into your mess, I encourage you to do so.

Good Day Ladies!

Psalms 18:16 He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters…. How thankful I am that I was not left to drown in my despair.

 

Continue Reading

July

Resuscitation

No Comments

Feeling failure has become one of the themes in my life. Failure is defined as the opposite of success, the omission of an expected action, or a collapse/ crash. I had a parenting collapse tonight with my nineteen year old son when attempting to point out the “lacking” in his lawn chores. It ended up with voices raised and me eventually using some not so nice language. Parenting fail. Christian fail. Leadership fail. Failure all around on my part which prompted an immediately apology on my behalf to my son. In my previous post I said some days are just hard to smile, today is a day like that and I have no excuse. I have a blissfully blessed life that allows me to do most things my heart desires. I have no right to have days where it’s difficult to smile, there are people starving throughout the world, people without the basic necessities of life and great need in the world. That is what my brain tells me… you don’t have an excuse to be moody, to be grouchy, to have bad days. Still, I find myself in prayer with great need, great longing to be forgiven, to be raised up out of this cantankerous pit, this mess I have made. Oh, the gentle nature of the Lord’s presence, it is what I seek when I enter into prayer as I begin to apologize to Him for my behavior and lack of imperfection.

I am so grateful I live under grace and not the law. I’d never make it under law. NEVER. Funny, yesterday I thought I did a good job, taking my mother in law to appointments, supporting friends and family in extra curriculum activities, stepping out of my comfort zone, soothing little ones through thunderstorms…but today was the exact opposite. It doesn’t change my love for the Lord, it doesn’t change the Lord’s love for me, nor does it change my statue in Lord’s eyes…but it does reveal my great dependence on Him to be effective on a daily basis.

I don’t know how your Saturday has gone but I hope no matter how it’s been you know you can seek resuscitation in the Lord. The only redeeming thing about failure is knowing that resuscitation is not far away when I invite the Lord into my mess. One thing I have learned throughout the years is that I will worship Jesus in the calm and I will worship Him in the storm. I will worship Him on the days I feel successful and I will worship Him on the days I feel failure. The key is worshipping Him no matter how I feel. (even with green eggs and ham- just a little humor because laughter is all around good medicine)

Sometimes I don’t even know how to go to the cross…all I can I do is hang my head and fall on God’s great mercy. In those moments He tenderly picks me up and reminds me of who I am…and how loved I am… I will worship no matter what my emotions say because He is always worthy of my worship regardless of the state I am in.

Psalms 108:  I am determined, O God!
 I will sing and praise you with my whole heart….

Good Evening Ladies…

PS. no matter the state you find yourself in, worship the Lord, and He will bring revival, recovery, restoration… no failure is able to hinder the Lord’s love for you!

 

Continue Reading

June

The Work

No Comments

I often pray that God will make me ready for the work. Not work as in a job, hours 9 to 5 but work as in putting forth effort to be an extension of grace and love. Work as in laboring to be forgiving and not growing weary of doing good in a world that is all about self-centeredness. Work as in making as many attempts as it takes to get it right, not perfect but right as in living a life of selflessness, forgiveness, and kindness. Some days are smoothing sailing and some days are challenging to even smile. The important thing to remember is to not give up because none of us are perfect.

Too often we think of the work as being something big and over the top but really the work that is most impacting is conducted in everyday life. It’s about leaving a person better than you found them. That kind of work is not found in big over the top displays but revealed through soft expressions of love in action. Work is about persevering through doubt, hurt, disappointment, and weariness continuing to be an extension of God’s presence. Work is not about winning someone to your personal cause, religion, or theology but about introducing them into a relationship with their Savior, Jesus Christ.

The work is not about titles, authority, or power. It is about serving even the underserving. I am a little weary of people that hang on to titles or religion as if they were to be cherished. And in being completely honest in my younger days I couldn’t wait to be ordained or to have my degree in biblical studies (both of which I have) but I quickly learned those things were given to me for the sake of assisting in serving more people; thus, the work expanded. Those things were merely tools God had given me to better support me in the work I was called to do. They were not bestowed upon me to inflate my ego of importance but to serve people better. With that in mind, I pray “help me to better serve You, Lord with what I have been given.” We all have different things, equipped specifically and uniquely for a detailed work particular to us.

I don’t know what you are going through, I can only tell you my story. In my life at the moment, we are responsible for both our widowed mothers, this in and of itself is challenging and tiring. We are incumbered with watching my sister go through radiation and chemo treatments for cancer. We are responsible to give our children the best life we can afford them filled with boundaries and lessons on self-discipline, self-awareness, and love. This does not count jobs, ministry, or schooling we are in, the paper I have yet to write,(working on my master degree) etc… This does not count the specific work God has set aside for us as individuals. This is why I pray God make me ready for the work because half the time I am just tired. I don’t know about you but fatigue makes me grumpy and quick to lash out in anger not grace (grace tank blog). Yes, God make me ready for the everyday work and the big event work, the small work and the big work, just make me ready for the work. Albert Einstein said “Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.”

That made me really think of what fueled my work? Is my work fueled by accomplishment and praises over my title(s)? Or is my work fueled by benefiting someone other than myself with no acknowledgement of my accomplishments, title(s) or sacrifices… God’s work is most importantly found in everyday life where there is no acknowledgment or plaque of achievement. This is an internal working where titles are useless and power is about serving someone other than self. Yes, God make me ready for this work… where no ego lives, vanity is gone, pride has departed, and conceit eradicated… Renew my heart and mind for that specific work so that I do not grow weary. Show me Your ways, oh Lord because they will prepare me for the challenges ahead. The work does not always feel good but work is not about feeling good it is about serving and doing with no titles, no ego, no self.

Matthew 9: 37 Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. 38 Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.”

It is my personal desire to be one of the workers in the harvest field, whatever that work maybe. I pray you discover your work for the Lord.

Good Night Ladies…

Continue Reading

June

Comforting Smells

No Comments

Today my ten year old carried a sweater up to me (as I was working in my office from home) and handing it to me she inhaled big and said “your sweater smells so good.” I smelled it and said I don’t smell anything to which she replied “it smells like you and I love that smell.” I have to admit it made me smile and my heart swell just a little bit.

As I sit here working on ministry work, breaking down parables for our class, I thought about what my daughter said to me, and I am consoled that this kind of comfort does not have to leave us as adults. God wants to bring that kind of comfort into our lives. We have been fearfully and wonderfully made in His image to which He searches the entire earth to find people, to rescue people, and to bring completion to their life through His, only begotten Son, Jesus Christ. I am constantly reminded how religion and hateful people try to take that from others. I encourage you today to allow God into your life to be that comfort you need, that smell of familiarity, and the voice of peace in your life that brings a transformational love. Comfort means to soothe, while I could not detect my own scent it was obvious that my daughter could and it brought her great comfort in smelling it. I believe God wants to be that for us right now. That soothing balm for our weary souls, troubled minds, and anxious hearts.

The Message Bible, Matthew 11: 28-30 “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

Don’t let anything or anyone keep you from receiving that incredible redemptive love. God wants you to be part of His family. I love that God’s family is made up of a lot of misfits. Oh, I could do an entire sermon about the misfits in God’s family but I don’t have enough room to do that on here. Please don’t let bad experiences, religious people, or anger keep you from receiving the comfort God has for. It is such a sweet, sweet love that brings a divine peace.

It is my prayer that each of you feel the love the Lord has for you and to know it is a personal love because Jesus is a personal Savior. You were created with individuality in a unique fashion for God’s glory that is to reveal God’s marvelous splendor to the world in a way that only you can. Don’t be a victim to past mistakes, current situations, or held hostage by emotions. God looks at you with tender affection. Comforting: God was an encouraging presence to Moses, God was a reassuring voice to Joshua, God was a calming voice to the Prophet Elijah, God was an inspiring voice Jeremiah, Jesus was an uplifting presence to the masses of people that sought His help over and over… Always from the beginning of creation until now God has desired to be a comfort in the lives of those that would allow Him.

I encourage you to take a leap of faith into the comforting arms of Jesus.

Good Afternoon Ladies…

PS. It took me a long time to realize the comfort of the Lord because all I was taught was His wrath, His anger, and judgment but God is a loving God and desires to be love in your life. It took me longer to realize His comforting voice because I didn’t really have one growing up. Even if you didn’t get to grow up with a comforting smell or voice from someone you loved, know that God desires to be that for you. He wants you to be part of His family. What gives me the most comfort in life is knowing that I am never alone, I know that God goes with me on this journey I travel. He is not offended to be part of my messy life. He brings a soothing order to my chaos, comforting my heart, soul, and mind. Renewing me each day for what is ahead.

Continue Reading

May

Overcoming the Terrain

No Comments

As I sit here reading through the book of Numbers (yet again) I came across this scripture and it struck a cord within me, “And the people became impatient on the way. And the people spoke against God and against Moses.” (numbers 21:4-5, ESV)

The word impatient can mean several things but here it means annoyed and anxious. And because the people were vexed with uneasiness they spoke out against God and God’s appointed leader. The journey was laborious and they grew weary: weary with not knowing, weary with lack of understanding, weary physically, weary emotionally. This is not an excuse for their behavior but a picture of what they faced. When we grow impatient with the Lord it means somewhere along the way we have lost our trust in Him. This is a crucial junction in faith because we need to stop, reflect, recollect, and ask God for help. The Israelites didn’t do that so they experience God’s judgment instead of grace. When the terrain of the journey seems too much to bear we then need to take refuge in God’s grace and mercy least we grumble against the Lord. God’s mercy is great and far reaching for those that seek it. Had the Israelites sought God’s grace they would have found it.

I can identify with this verse growing impatient and speaking out of emotion instead of asking for help. I love that God leaves the story of the past in the bible for us to learn from, so we don’t have to make the same mistakes. I don’t know how your journey looks or how difficult the terrain is, I only know my own. Yesterday out of my own frustration I complained in anger to which I had to repent of. I don’t want to ever become a hostage to my emotions; thus, out of the will of God.

Whatever your terrain looks like seek God’s assistance along the way, take refuge in His deep love and unending mercy for you. We do not have to complain and speak out against the Lord, we simple just need to ask for His help (regardless if it’s once, twice, or twenty times a day). He delights in helping us! God can’t help those that don’t ask. I encourage you to seek His assistance and ask for help when the journey has become burdensome.

Take comfort knowing Jesus will never ever leave you… even if you can’t see Him, He is there fighting your battle with you, every step of the way. The Israelites took their eyes off of the Lord and onto the terrain, so they forgot about all God had done for them and that He was traveling among them… Remember God makes us brave for the journey, ready for the work, geared for the pop-up battles, and equipped for the terrain. Trust His judgment even if you are drenched in the unknown and remember that God deems you fit for the expedition (even you don’t).

Good Afternoon Ladies.

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Matthew 14:27But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Take courage, it is I; do not be afraid.”

Continue Reading

May

Trusting in the Storm

1 Comment

April was a month full of emotions as my youngest sister was diagnosed with cancer. Then we found out the cancer had spread another whammy in the emotional department. Oh, the storms of life are hard to ride out with our faith intact. I know God to be good, loving, kind, compassionate, forgiving, and merciful. It is at times difficult to see those qualities when faith is faltering and all hell is breaking lose. Faith is not an easy thing to cultivate; yet, it is required of us.

In Matthew 14 the disciples encountered a storm on the lake as they were sailing across it but when Jesus appeared out of nowhere it startled them and invoked fear. Why? They weren’t looking least of all expecting God to show up to help them. They were overcome with emotion so much so they didn’t even recognize Jesus as He approached them. Even the chosen twelve found it difficult at times to develop their faith; so, God used the storms of their life as teaching tools to help them learn to rely on Him alone. Reliance means we have an understanding that we can trust in the Lord even if we don’t know what He is up to.

 Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous! Do not fear or tremble before them, for the LORD your God is the one who is going with you. He will not fail you or abandon you!” The key here is that God will not abandon you no matter the battle you are facing or the storm that surrounds you. You may not always know what God is up to but He is going before you to help you. That should feed faith.  Jesus says in John 14:18 I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Jesus had no intention of letting the disciples fend the storm off alone but He allowed them enough distance ahead to realize they couldn’t do it without Him. Oh, Faith is a challenging thing to grow and then remain in and yet it is essential to do.

We often demand evidence of God’s greatness and when that evidence is not produced in a manner we choose we usually respond with an outburst. It’s important to understand faith is personal, so the journey that it takes you on will be personal. Your faith is unique to you. It is designed that way because God is personal and so are the evidences He bestows upon us through fellowship. Avoid the fellowship you’ll miss the evidence.

There are two responses to the Lord: to receive Him and the challenges that accompany that journey or to run from Him and from the blessings that arise out of the journey. It is so much easier just to ditch God when life gets difficult or when our prayers don’t get answered the way we want, or we don’t like what He says… the harder thing to do is trust… oh trusting is so difficult, isn’t it? It’s acknowledging you have given control to someone else and that is scary, isn’t it. That is faith though…it’s scary and reassuring at the same time. Faith development isn’t for the faint of heart. Like a mature oak tree, we need deep roots, rooted in the foundation of Jesus Christ to sustain us through the storms of life as the winds threatened to upheaval us, and the waves drown us.

I don’t know what you are facing but it is my hope and prayer that you receive the Lord and trust Him. Do not let your emotions (especially anger) keep you alienated from God. Do not let how people represent God keep you apart from Him and do not let the storms of life keep you separate from God. When you call upon His name, know it is personal, He is a personal God, that desires to uphold you- in the fashion He chooses. Trust His judgment and know He will not abandon you ever. In Romans 8 the Apostle Paul assures us that nothing can separate us from the love of Christ. Know there is a reason for the challenges that are before you and God will work them out for your benefit, if you will  venture to trust Him. And know that God understands how difficult cultivating faith is; therefore, He is patient but still expectant.

Good Evening Ladies….

PS.  Psalms 121

I look up toward the hills.
From where does my help come?
2 My help comes from the Lord,
the Creator of heaven and earth!

 

 

 

Continue Reading

April

“Grace Tank”

No Comments

A few days ago my husband said to me that his grace tank was empty- this was after a very laborious day of errands, caring for mothers (both of ours are windows), and children. I was trying to gently remind him to have grace while we were at a home improvement store looking for a new washer- because it’s been one of those weeks. I have learned to tread lightly around my husband when it comes to correction because he does not take kindly to me pastoring him… thus I do not.

The question then becomes what exactly is grace? In Greek grace means favor or to stoop in kindness- as in bend forward or bend down in compassion. Grace is God’s mercy towards us. God is continuously bending down to cover us in compassion. That mercy distinguishes us as loved. We are called to pay that forward.

How often do I feel the same way- that “my grace tank is empty.” At times it seems we live in a world that just takes and takes from us without giving back. The agenda on this week my sister’s surgery regarding her recent cancer diagnosis, my mother had another complex oral surgery done (today), and my senior dog – I’ve had for 13 years- was diagnosed with congestive heart failure (I already mentioned my washer broke and was unrepairable). So, money we set aside to pay off debut (we are that American family) had to be spent on the washing machine and my mother’s surgery (she is disabled and on a very fixed income)… Yes, I can see how my husband’s grace tank was empty, mine is not far behind with what seems like a never ending flow of need from people in our lives.

And yet I can hear the Apostle Paul saying not to grow weary of doing good. Sigh… but I am drained I tell you! The question then becomes how do I keep grace overflowing within my heart and actions? ( a full grace tank)

I’d have to ask myself what kind of deposits am I putting into my mind and heart? What am I feeding my soul? Sigh it’s never as easy as it seems. I have learned it is best to keep my thoughts renewed in the Word of God and prayer- this and this alone renews the grace I am called to cover people in. Still at times I find this task daunting.

The truth is I have been trying really hard to not allow my grace tank to run out but to keep grace despite my mood, what is going on around me, or my hormones… I’ll be honest driving is still a challenge but I am getting better!

Whatever you are facing this week I hope you first encounter God’s great love for you where you can be renewed by His grace and then are able to extend that grace to those around you.  It won’t always be easy… but press forward because faith points us in a forward motion not backward.

😊 Good Afternoon Ladies!

ps. Where do we encounter God? In the Word of God and prayer… daily renewing feeds our faith… empowers us for the work…

Continue Reading

March

Light in the Closet

No Comments

As we approach the celebration of Easter I am aware this is the first time in over a decade I will not be working as a lead staff member at church, not even as minor staff member for that matter. While my heart is a little sad I know my spirit needs this season of rest. I will be celebrating Easter at home this year, not because I don’t believe in church, I believe in the Body of Christ with all my heart, but we are do a quiet reflection on Easter away from church this year. To be brutally honest partly because I don’t want to go into a church as an Easter percentage (clergy get what I mean) and partly because I don’t feel I need a sermon preached at me concerning Jesus’ sacrifice. I am after all an ordained minister, a pastor, and a bible teacher… I am well aware of the meaning of Easter. I ‘ve taught on it for over a decade as a youth pastor and an associate pastor.

I debated on writing an Easter blog, there are so many great blogs out there already concerning the importance and significance of Easter. So, I thought I would share part of my personal relationship with the Lord. In my personal study I am in the book of Leviticus (it’s not for the faint of heart no matter how many times I read it) and in my corporate study we are in the book of Matthew, slowly going over every verse, studying the time era in Israel, the customs, and so forth to get a good picture of the entire meaning of the scriptures. While I am not actively working at church each Sunday,  I am still actively teaching weekly; thus working with a church, in an outreach ministry.

Anyway,  I’ve heard people say throughout the years they don’t like the Old Testament because grace is not as easy to see. But it is there, always it is there. The older I get the more difficult time I have with studying a male dominated society that treated women like second class citizens. Leviticus isn’t for the faint of heart. There are times I have to ask God to help me see His love within the passages that sit before me because my vision is too weak. God never hides Himself, when we seek Him, He will reveal Himself. (Even in the book of Leviticus!)

For so long I viewed the internal working of my heart and mind like a creepy, horror flick with a long hallway and lots of doors. You never know what might pop out, is it resentment, lack of anger management, bitterness, jealousy, or uncontrolled words. Who knows what is lurking in the recesses of my heart and mind? For a long time, I prayed that Jesus would be the light in each of those rooms uncovering anything hidden behind closed doors or in my secret closets so there would be nothing between Him and me.

During prayer recently, I had a new vision. God is a builder and He builds on what we bring Him, often times, He will remodel because there is such a great need for it. No longer do I view the internal workings of my heart and mind as a creepy horror flick of a long hallway with closed doors. Instead I see the room in my heart and mind as one huge open space connected in the most beautiful fashion, there are no closets because there is nothing to hide, everything is out in the open. The most incredible light shines in that room with such an easiness and comfort accompanied by a peace that only the Lord can bring.

I don’t need Easter to remind me of what Jesus did for me but I understand  many do because they forgo a daily relationship with Him for Christmas and Easter visitation only.

Jesus died to save us, death could not contain Him. He was resurrected because He overcame death. He came back to rescue us. It sounds like a beautiful myth, like something out of a fairytale. Fortunately for us Jesus is not a beautiful myth. He is real and ready to save us. There is no situation that God won’t walk into, to get to you. There is nothing too slummy, nothing too profane, or offensive that God won’t endure to get to you. He endured humanity (at it’s worse), He endured humiliation, He endured rejection, He endured torment, and He endured death… Why? To get to YOU!

That love is supernatural. That love surpasses all the things we get ourselves into. It trumps whatever we are hiding in our closets. And it strips all religious expectation and limitation. Ponder on that for a minute.

John 3:16  For this is the way God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.

Good Afternoon Ladies and a Happy Easter!

PS. While I cherish John 3:16, John 20:29 brings me comfort… because believing can be so difficult at times… take a chance on faith… ( I wont lie as I write take a chance, Abba pops in my head and I can hear the words, “honey, I’m still free” with that disco dancing rhythm. just keeping it real)

John 20:29 29 Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are the people who have not seen and yet have believed.”

Continue Reading